Upon finishing story time the other night, I couldn’t help noticing this advertisement.

After taking it in, ladies, I want to offer you a long-overdue apology – not only for this particular ad but also for all the other unhelpful nonsense thrown at you during your blossoming, question-filled years.

Around that age us guys were busy squinting at G n’ R cassette inserts and beating up younger brothers. Sure, we had a wet dream here and there. But you know what? Big f-ing deal. We had it way easier than every single one of you, and I’m guessing most of us didn’t offer any condolences back then.

So I’m hoping late and en masse is better than never.

Sorry you gals had it worse than we did. It’s the truth, and you gals deserve to have us admit it.